My Five-Year Plan Is to Avoid Dying in an Embarrassing Way T-Shirt – Skeleton Dark Humour Graphic Tee
Maroon / S
$39.99
Passer aux informations sur le produit
Ambition is important. Keeping expectations realistic is even better.
The My Five-Year Plan Is to Avoid Dying in an Embarrassing Way T-Shirt turns long-term planning into something far more achievable.
Featuring a lounging skeleton beneath the statement:
“MY FIVE-YEAR PLAN IS TO AVOID DYING IN AN EMBARRASSING WAY.”
This design blends dark humour, existential sarcasm, and wonderfully low-stakes life goals into one bold graphic. The red, white, grey, and black palette gives it a strong, distressed look that works especially well on black fabric, while the skeleton illustration adds just the right amount of morbid charm.
Perfect for Gen X personalities, cynics, sarcastic adults, coworkers, procrastinators, dark-humour fans, and anyone whose strategic plan currently consists of simply making it through without becoming a cautionary tale.
💀 Skeleton dark-humour artwork
📅 A five-year plan with refreshingly modest expectations
😂 Existential, sarcastic, and painfully relatable
🔥 Bold red, white, and black graphic styling
🤘 Strong Gen X and cynical-humour energy
🎁 Great gift for friends, coworkers, siblings, procrastinators, and anyone with questionable long-term planning skills
Classic Unisex Tee
The 100% cotton unisex classic tee will help you land a more structured look. It sits nicely, maintains sharp lines around the edges, and goes perfectly with layered streetwear outfits. Plus, it's extra trendy now!
• 100% cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
• Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
• Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²)
• Open-end yarn
• Tubular fabric
• Taped neck and shoulders
• Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
• Blank product sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico
Disclaimers:
• Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
• Dark color speckles throughout the fabric are expected for the color Natural.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
My Five-Year Plan Is to Avoid Dying in an Embarrassing Way T-Shirt – Skeleton Dark Humour Graphic Tee
$39.99
The My Five-Year Plan Is to Avoid Dying in an Embarrassing Way T-Shirt turns long-term planning into something far more achievable.
Featuring a lounging skeleton beneath the statement:
“MY FIVE-YEAR PLAN IS TO AVOID DYING IN AN EMBARRASSING WAY.”
This design blends dark humour, existential sarcasm, and wonderfully low-stakes life goals into one bold graphic. The red, white, grey, and black palette gives it a strong, distressed look that works especially well on black fabric, while the skeleton illustration adds just the right amount of morbid charm.
Perfect for Gen X personalities, cynics, sarcastic adults, coworkers, procrastinators, dark-humour fans, and anyone whose strategic plan currently consists of simply making it through without becoming a cautionary tale.
💀 Skeleton dark-humour artwork
📅 A five-year plan with refreshingly modest expectations
😂 Existential, sarcastic, and painfully relatable
🔥 Bold red, white, and black graphic styling
🤘 Strong Gen X and cynical-humour energy
🎁 Great gift for friends, coworkers, siblings, procrastinators, and anyone with questionable long-term planning skills
Classic Unisex Tee
The 100% cotton unisex classic tee will help you land a more structured look. It sits nicely, maintains sharp lines around the edges, and goes perfectly with layered streetwear outfits. Plus, it's extra trendy now!
• 100% cotton
• Sport Grey is 90% cotton, 10% polyester
• Ash Grey is 99% cotton, 1% polyester
• Heather colors are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
• Fabric weight: 5.0–5.3 oz/yd² (170-180 g/m²)
• Open-end yarn
• Tubular fabric
• Taped neck and shoulders
• Double seam at sleeves and bottom hem
• Blank product sourced from Honduras, Nicaragua, Haiti, Dominican Republic, Bangladesh, Mexico
Disclaimers:
• Due to the fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.
• Dark color speckles throughout the fabric are expected for the color Natural.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
Size guide
| LENGTH (inches) | WIDTH (inches) | SLEEVE LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 28 | 18 | 15 ⅝ |
| M | 29 | 20 | 17 |
| L | 30 | 22 | 18 ½ |
| XL | 31 | 24 | 20 |
| 2XL | 32 | 26 | 21 ½ |
| 3XL | 33 | 28 | 22 ¾ |
| 4XL | 34 | 30 | 24 ¼ |
| 5XL | 35 | 32 | 25 ¼ |
| LENGTH (cm) | WIDTH (cm) | SLEEVE LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 71.1 | 45.7 | 39.7 |
| M | 73.7 | 50.8 | 43.2 |
| L | 76.2 | 55.9 | 47 |
| XL | 78.7 | 61 | 50.8 |
| 2XL | 81.3 | 66 | 54.6 |
| 3XL | 83.8 | 71.1 | 58 |
| 4XL | 86.4 | 76.2 | 61.5 |
| 5XL | 89 | 81.3 | 64.3 |